I had my first Pearl Jam experience in the bedroom of my neighbor, Sally. Not like that, sicko!!!! Gosh!! We were in middle school/junior high, and her mom used to take me to school. So, I would head to their house in the morning, and we would listen to music until her mom was ready to load us into the suburban.
The grunge scene was just taking off, and Sally was a FAN. Like, dark roots with the blond hair, black lipstick, flannels, Doc Martens, ripped jeans FAN. I thought she was pretty much the coolest person EVER.
Just so you really understand where I was coming from, I was not allowed to listen to Madonna, nor pierce my ears yet. Yep. Of course, I listened to KROQ on my "walkman" (Ouch, I'm really dating myself here), and secretly applied a Wet'n'Wild dark purple lipstick in the bathroom at school. Oh take THAT, Mom!!! I spent hours of my young life begging my mom to let me wear ripped jeans ("NO. Why would you want to trash yourself, and look like a slob?"), and Doc Martens ( "NO--are you planning on kicking someone to death? Why do you need army boots?", "But Mom!!! Even my church friends wear them! Come ON!!!!"--eyes fill with "How-will-I-ever-be-cool-without-Doc-Martens?!" tears). I think the only things I successfully talked her into were Converse tennis shoes, and a couple of long-sleeve flannels.
So, when Sally-the-Cool played Pearl Jam and Nirvana in her room, I listened in AWE. I remember really liking Pearl Jam, but literally couldn't understand most of what he was singing, and was too young to comprehend the emotional magnitude of the lyrics I actually could understand. Nirvana's "Smells like Teen Spirit" made me want to jump around the room, while flailing my arms and tossing my hair, but I was a little scared of "Rape Me" (keep in mind-- "I Love Lucy", and "Family Matters" were the only shows I was allowed to watch at this point). So Kurt screaming "Rape me, my friend" was a confusing/frightening concept for me.
Fast-forward quite a few years. Boyfriend hears that Pearl Jam will be performing in L.A. in a couple of months, and this sends him into a Class A Pearl Jam listening party. iPod at home, CD's in the car, Pearl Jam EVERYWHERE. He keeps talking about how much he wants to go see them perform. I'm thinking "Hmm....I can't remember any of their early songs, but I vaguely remember liking the stuff in Sally's room...black lipstick--wow--REALLY?! .....a concert could be fun.....I like that 'Better Man' song.....I don't like that song about the car crash and the dead girlfriend..."
Boyfriend: "You KNOW Pearl Jam songs, trust me."
Me: "Remember, I'm like, 27 years younger than you are, so....."
Boyfriend: "Suck it. You are Robin, I am Batman."
Me: "And then you woke up. In your power chair. Making chirping noises. Because you are Robin, and you are old."
Boyfriend (while making very pointed hand gesture towards me): "Shut it. Listen to these songs--you know them."
He proceeds to play about 20 seconds of a song, then another song, then another, etc...
Me (getting progressively higher pitched with every exclamation, hands flying excitedly in every direction): "Oooh! I like that song! Oooooh, I LOVE that song! Ooooooooh! I FORGOT about that song! WOW. They're really good, huh?! Can I borr---"
Boyfriend: "Yes, you can borrow my CD's. Bring them back, or I'll kill you."
Me: "Whatever, Grayson. And then you woke up. The hum of your powerchair must've put you to sleep."
We have a pattern. And yes, we've been successfully running the same jokes into the ground for a couple of years now. Easily amused.
***Side note to completely belabor the point~ Boyfriend just called, it went like this:
Boyfriend (in Britney Spears accent--we enjoy recreating this): "Whatchu doin', babyyyy?"
Me: Writin' a blog... you know..."
Boyfriend: "Is it funny? I like the funny ones. Am I in it?"
Me: "I hope so (?), and yes, you're in it. It's about Pearl Jam."
Boyfriend: "You better give me credit for taking you to the concert, or I'll kill you, b*tch!!!"
The grunge scene was just taking off, and Sally was a FAN. Like, dark roots with the blond hair, black lipstick, flannels, Doc Martens, ripped jeans FAN. I thought she was pretty much the coolest person EVER.
Just so you really understand where I was coming from, I was not allowed to listen to Madonna, nor pierce my ears yet. Yep. Of course, I listened to KROQ on my "walkman" (Ouch, I'm really dating myself here), and secretly applied a Wet'n'Wild dark purple lipstick in the bathroom at school. Oh take THAT, Mom!!! I spent hours of my young life begging my mom to let me wear ripped jeans ("NO. Why would you want to trash yourself, and look like a slob?"), and Doc Martens ( "NO--are you planning on kicking someone to death? Why do you need army boots?", "But Mom!!! Even my church friends wear them! Come ON!!!!"--eyes fill with "How-will-I-ever-be-cool-without-Doc-Martens?!" tears). I think the only things I successfully talked her into were Converse tennis shoes, and a couple of long-sleeve flannels.
So, when Sally-the-Cool played Pearl Jam and Nirvana in her room, I listened in AWE. I remember really liking Pearl Jam, but literally couldn't understand most of what he was singing, and was too young to comprehend the emotional magnitude of the lyrics I actually could understand. Nirvana's "Smells like Teen Spirit" made me want to jump around the room, while flailing my arms and tossing my hair, but I was a little scared of "Rape Me" (keep in mind-- "I Love Lucy", and "Family Matters" were the only shows I was allowed to watch at this point). So Kurt screaming "Rape me, my friend" was a confusing/frightening concept for me.
Fast-forward quite a few years. Boyfriend hears that Pearl Jam will be performing in L.A. in a couple of months, and this sends him into a Class A Pearl Jam listening party. iPod at home, CD's in the car, Pearl Jam EVERYWHERE. He keeps talking about how much he wants to go see them perform. I'm thinking "Hmm....I can't remember any of their early songs, but I vaguely remember liking the stuff in Sally's room...black lipstick--wow--REALLY?! .....a concert could be fun.....I like that 'Better Man' song.....I don't like that song about the car crash and the dead girlfriend..."
Boyfriend: "You KNOW Pearl Jam songs, trust me."
Me: "Remember, I'm like, 27 years younger than you are, so....."
Boyfriend: "Suck it. You are Robin, I am Batman."
Me: "And then you woke up. In your power chair. Making chirping noises. Because you are Robin, and you are old."
Boyfriend (while making very pointed hand gesture towards me): "Shut it. Listen to these songs--you know them."
He proceeds to play about 20 seconds of a song, then another song, then another, etc...
Me (getting progressively higher pitched with every exclamation, hands flying excitedly in every direction): "Oooh! I like that song! Oooooh, I LOVE that song! Ooooooooh! I FORGOT about that song! WOW. They're really good, huh?! Can I borr---"
Boyfriend: "Yes, you can borrow my CD's. Bring them back, or I'll kill you."
Me: "Whatever, Grayson. And then you woke up. The hum of your powerchair must've put you to sleep."
We have a pattern. And yes, we've been successfully running the same jokes into the ground for a couple of years now. Easily amused.
***Side note to completely belabor the point~ Boyfriend just called, it went like this:
Boyfriend (in Britney Spears accent--we enjoy recreating this): "Whatchu doin', babyyyy?"
Me: Writin' a blog... you know..."
Boyfriend: "Is it funny? I like the funny ones. Am I in it?"
Me: "I hope so (?), and yes, you're in it. It's about Pearl Jam."
Boyfriend: "You better give me credit for taking you to the concert, or I'll kill you, b*tch!!!"
Me: "Oh YEAH. You're definitely getting credit. In fact, just for that, your entire last sentence will be published. Suck it, Boy Wonder."
Done, and DONE! Ask and you shall receive, Robin!!!! (Fist bump for myself).
Done, and DONE! Ask and you shall receive, Robin!!!! (Fist bump for myself).
Coming soon~ Part 2: The video performance that sold me on Pearl Jam...
Long sleeve flannels? Really?! I must have been super uncool because I never even thought of wearing that!
ReplyDeleteI am so deeply in love with Eeeno's World, as it is a strange and mystical place where boyfriends impersonate Britney Spears and you talk about your love of Doc Martens.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant.
Also, please post a blog soon of Pearl Jam based SOLELY on the fact that no one can understand what the frak he's saying. And by nobody I mean me.
I still have a pair of doc's.
ReplyDelete